what's up.

Oh, what a month.

My cousin has been gone almost a month. I'm still not sure if it's completely hit me yet. I won't give too much detail out in the bloggisphere, but he was shot and killed. It was so tragic, so violent, so awful. We're still coping. We will be coping for quite some time. The horrible human beings who did this to him were charged with aggravated robbery and murder one. Hopefully, they'll be in jail forever, never able to do this to another family ever again.

I've been having nightmares ever since. There have been some other family health scares over the past month. My uncle (my cousin's dad) has actually been very sick and in the hospital having major surgery. My grandfather on my mom's side was in the hospital for a week with a failing epiglottis. He was breathing in food and water and got pneumonia from it.

Needless to say, it's been hard. Really hard. Between the nightmares, the stress and pain of losing a close relative, and the complete anxiety of every time the phone rings freaking out thinking that another tragedy has hit me, I'm exhausted. I keep a smile on my face because it's who I am, but I'm beat. Mentally, physically, emotionally beat.

It's been a very tough month.

So, what else...
I'm really liking my new place, although I've been in such a stress-fog that I haven't really taken the time to sit down and enjoy it. Photo stuff has been great, but busy, so the little bit of time I've had to sit, I've been editing. But pictures are my happy place and I love it. The photos I sold for the flood was a huge success! I was able to donate $350 to Hands on Nashville. They sent me a very sweet thank you letter. I was happy to be able to raise a bit of cash to send their way. They're doing such great things.

Cord and I are doing well. I see him, like, never... but I am so in heart with him still. Maybe that's the key? Never see each other and then the little time you do get to spend is valued so much more? We just booked a trip to Chicago for late July. I'm so, so, so excited. The last "vacation" we went on was in August of 2007 to Disney World. We were in such a different place then... we were kids, for sure. Hell, we're still kids! We're staying at the Dana Hotel and Spa downtown Chicago. His bro stayed there recently and said it was amazing. I'm super excited!

My Maryland trip over Memorial day was when we ended up having my cousin's funeral, so the trip was obviously not the trip we had planned for. I hope to get back to MD again this summer to get over to see everyone. I miss home so, so much.

Until next time...